She stands there
Closing her eyes
Listening to the bristling leaves

It is calm
Peaceful
A serenity that she hopes for

But then again
The sky does what it does best
'It's gonna rain soon'
And like her heart
It starts to pound restlessly

She closes again her eyes
Praying for future
That she never sure of
She wants to be featured
In her own dream
But afraid that the dream
Will just remain as a dream

While clenching her fist
She keeps comforting herself
Telling her heart
Everything is just gonna be fine

Then she looks up at the sky again
She told herself this
It's okay not to be known on this earth
But hopefully
The heaven is talking about her
As God is looking upon her
So it's okay to remain
As a girl whose name is unknown.

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim

Assalamualaikum and salam ukhuwah to all.

*This was supposed to be last week's post but yeaaahhh*

BGM: Coffee Shop - CNBlue


We have so many dilemma in life. Whether to wear this or that. Whether to smile or just facing the floor while walking. Whether to study or to watch movie (or blogging ¯\_(ツ)_/¯). Whether to eat or maybe lose some weight.

Speaking of which..

Our biggest dilemma wasn't really about the most complicated things in this world; like career or who's gonna be your husband.

Really. The simplest yet the hardest everyday basic question is "Where to eat?!".

God, I really hate this when they asked me. Simply because I can't answer. I just can't. I cannot decide where to eat. But thank God at least I can decide what to eat (though it takes some time too but it's not as bad as deciding where to eat).

So typical us.. Our daily drama marathon is basically about this one dilemma. It's getting nonsense yet funnier as year goes by. Seriously...when will I learn to decide things ASAP? The fact that this 'disease' was carried by me and my friends got infected by it. Pity them for befriend with a person like me. ╮(╯▽╰)╭

So this weekend's drama featuring us of just going to any place we can think of without actually planning ahead. Crazy as we can be, at one point we found one cafe that at first we thought we wanted to go (but plan changed), so my friend did a sudden U-turn (at a rightful place to make a U-turn, along with me encouraging haha). We already inside the cafe, holding the menu. But then we left, because one of us cannot stand the smell of coffee while the rest are coffee lovers, so we had to consider her taste bud too.

But in the end of the drama, after checking out three different cafes, we finally decided on this one cafe (which the coffee smell was much stronger than the previous one), but to avoid the smell, we picked a table outside the cafe. And yes, to add on, this cafe serves more choice so I think it's the best choice (at least for today) for us.

So, here you go... A nice cafe, with a nice coffee smell, and friendly staff who still recognize my face as I just went there last week hahah. I love their coffee too

Cafe: Coffee Gallery Kuantan

This one was from my friend's phone

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim

Assalamualaikum people.

Finally, I start to type again. I'm not sure of not having time is the cause of not blogging or it's just that I run out of idea and that I'm just waaayy too lazy.

Okay, back to the topic.

I'm just gonna share my experience of a lifetime. Being a dental student, oral surgery should be one of the bread and butter in the profession. I mean, even in Malaysia, most of people here won't use their money in term of preservation and conservation of their teeth. Most of them (maybe some have become more aware of the value of our teeth), would rather go for extraction.

And today, it's about the last molar/third molar (some people may have, or may not, please go to the dentist and have a checkup), or what Malay people called "gigi bongsu". Some people may have symptoms of fever, pain or maybe nothing at all when these third molars are erupting.

In my case, the right lower one is partially erupted, and it didn't cause me any trouble (so far). But on the other hand, my other third molars are still not erupt. They're still inside the bone. And it started to feel pain this year on my left lower jaw. Most of people, they claimed to feel pain at this side, not knowing its a radiating pain from the third molar (well it may be or maybe not). So some of them might end up in the wrong place to check it.

As I was aware of this case myself (inshaAllah gonna be a dentist but Allah knows better, but hopefully yes) I straight away took a radiograph (in this case OPG, google it people) it was indeed my lower left third molar was erupting mesially towards my second molar. It wasn't that painful though, but rather it felt as if an annoying little brother trying to annoy you at times. Although in my case, Dr said you can wait, so they kinda give me the power to decide.

I decided to remove it, and sooo minor oral surgery it is. Being a dental student, I sort of believe to feel first what the patient might feel later, is like you know, there's this some special connection in it. You have been in their shoes (for that specific matter), and you can assure your patient that it's going to be just fine.

But the drilling, I know it can be bothersome, but try to bear with it. It's not an easy procedure but it can be done, and looking at my lecturers, I'm sure they are all full of experiences people, that they'll know what to do. I'm praying that I will become one too.. But not oral surgery though. Or should I? Okay don't know.

So, the process was one long hours process. First, the operator anesthesized me then need to wait until the local anaesthesia (LA) do it's magic, I didn't feel any sharp seriously. But yesterday, it didn't take too long for the LA to work, good job sister!

And then, comes the Oh My God there must be blood starting to flow out as they are cutting through my tissue. But I didn't feel any pain, but of course I was aware of what they're doing eventhough I was blindfolded. Then the next part, which might annoy you was the drilling part. Because they have to remove the bone in order to reach the molar inside. I was a little bit anxious during this part, so I kept on praying everything gonna be ease by Allah.

During the pulling-out-tooth-from-socket part (it's not a dental jargon, my own term hahah), it was rather a bit painful, just a bit as you actually start to feel tired of having to open your mouth for the past 2 hours (more or less), and that this procedure need such force in order to pull the tooth out. But it's not going to too long, if the dentist know where to pull.

The last part, was the suturing part. I have never imagine being sutured, all my life. And hopefully will not have to in the future, but still need to suture my other upcoming patients. You won't feel pain given that the LA is enough. But yes, of course you know you are being sutured! There are thread coming out from your mouth. You know when you are being sutured.

And last but not least, I started to feel the almost unbearable pain after the LA finished its job. I expected it, but didn't expect it to feel that way. Yes, the first day, you would feel like to bang your head or something but mine wasn't that severe. I just kept hitting the wall with my hand instead of head to at least interrupt the pain from locating at the surgical site. And the saliva kept flowing out (it became better once LA is not there anynore).

Mind you, this is of personal experience, not entirely scientific, dental kind of knowledge (well, some of it may be experience by all, some may not). The not so fun part of course, you can only eat soft food. And hard to open your mouth as it started to swell. And hard to brush your teeth. And can only rest on the bed (but this supposed to be fun but I'm bored, seriously).

Might also start to study.

Go ahead. Try to open the book. Let's see if you can study... or maybe another movie-marathon day hahah. 

On a rainy night
She walked all alone by herself
Starting to wonder
How did she ended up
In a place far from home
Indeed she missed her home
Her mother, her father,
Her family as a whole
Not to forget her fluffy cats
And one small tortoise living amongst the fish.
She missed them most
Especially when she could hear the sound of the raindrops
The smell of rain and the wet earth after.
She did had a feeling
Of going out of the roof
And just let the raindrops shower her 
Soaking her clothes
Though the rain won't wash her pain away
But at least she would feel at ease
As if someone was comforting her
Whispering that it's gonna be okay
Telling her everything's gonna be
Just fine.
On a rainy night,
She wrote this wanting to tell her feelings 
But she couldn't
So she hoped that the rain 
Somehow
Absorbs her feelings 
And the entire emotions
She's been kept battling inside.

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim

Assalamualaikum wbt.

You see. 
Many people think they are the only ones who are having difficulties. 
They only see what's revolving inside them. 
They can only see the problems that they have to face.
They forget.
That they live in a world full of people.
They forget that the world is not only revolve around them. 
It revolves around others too.
But when every and each of us only think of ourselves, 
We tend to neglect others' feelings.
When someone being all grumpy,
Have you ever thought whether they were having bad days?
Or would you simply say, that person ruined your beautiful day?
Or maybe would you neglect people
When the fact that they are in need of you at most for that time?
We would have never know
Unless we stop living in this world
Only thinking about ourselves
Because at one time 
The moon, earth and sun would be in a parallel line,
The moon still need the sun to reflect the light,
The earth needs the moon and sun to light up the darkness.
We are in need of each other.
So why do you only care about you?
p/s: I'm pointing this to myself. Most of them.

Bismillahirrahamnirrahim

Assalamualaikum and salam ukhuwah.


Here I am, in the chilly, cold library. No. Don't say I am so rajin or this or that. The fact I just want to use the better and faster wifi than that in our mahallah. And since we don't have any schedule for the evening session. Haaahh~

It was actually the official day of me using the dental chair (though there wasn't any official patient yet, still). My conclusion, pity my future patients. I need more practices.

InshaAllah we'll be starting with our official patient for Prosthodontic Dentistry tomorrow. Again, I need to revise more. I really hope we can at least make a denture that will last longer. And actually can make the patient feels happy.

And who knows she'll be using that to read the Quran. Just by thinking about it makes me so nervous, excited (?) yet scared at the same time. You know... those kinds of mixed feelings? I'm sure y'know.

This upcoming weekend (where I am supposed to be home but no) we'll be having a basic life support seminar. That means, NO weekend for us.

But hey, this is the path that I chose. So, I just need to bear for some more. But I must admit that I need extra energy. Exhausted already. Meh.

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim

Assalamualaikum wbt.



I was excited. At first.
About the hospital visit.

But then again, it wasn't thaaat(?) exciting for the fact that we have to go there and literally have to budge those sick people's time to rest. It wasn't our intention to, you know 'just asking around menyibuk here and there'. NO. Definitely not.

We were assigned just like medical students (except they forgot that we were lacking on medical basics and practices even on theories, till now I couldn't understand why? wait, I do understand, but still I have my own judgement and opinions). It was the first visit on Tuesday's night, then we (by we I mean the presenters) need to present to medical lecturers on the history taking and the physical examination. By right, we should have the knowledge of doing those things. They think. Well, they were wrong. We had to learn from our seniors who were previously had the same problems as us. And by books. Yup. All sorts of books especially those that had been summarized. But of course, the lecturers didn't like those kinds.

It was different than the dental lecturers. Though some may be strict, yes. Perfectionist, of course. But maybe, they just don't want us to take this for granted. I mean, it's not our 'field'. We only will be part time med students for like a year? But still, it was all because we don't know them. For our dental lecturers, we at least know a bit from our seniors. Or from other lecturers. But for med lecturers, we had to ask around (from the med students especially the final year students). They already knew these doctors.

And it had been 4 weeks since then. Blame my 'super busy' schedule (busy lah sangat). But for awhile, I thought this may be something that is useful for the future. At least I got to know how to diagnose a disease for my family and monitor their medication and stuff like that. Yes, for future sake. The med student told us that and I reflected again my niat. Again, straight to the heart.

I clerked one patient last week for short case (meaning I only have to do physical examination without having to take history taking). But then, since I have no one to guide me, I think I did some parts wrong. Pity that patient. And that's how I determine to at least learn first with others before we can proceed with the real patients. I mean, for med students, that will be their job in the future. So, they have that you know, feeling(?), or passion or something like that. They knew how to handle these patients without considering them as a task(?). We... I don't say generally but I point most to myself, maybe having an inner battle of what to focus on more.

It's our first clinical year. In dental clinic. But we also need to pass General Medicine General Surgery. Having to divide the time for both is really a tough thing to do, but hey it's not that impossible. If the seniors can do this, then inshaAllah we all can do this.

And yeah, we had presented a seminar last week. Pisang goreng, I seriously have to work on my basic medical sciences. I couldn't even answer the questions from the doctor. But lucky me, we students have shiny teeth. So boleh sengih jelah tak dapat jawab. Hehe.