just this once,

6/18/2010 12:24:00 AM

I'm feeling hard
much harder than before
I want to move
but something keep holding me back
is it the past?
or it just me
wondering too much about the future.

I try to make myself to back on the track
but I keep falling off as I step out
pretend to be someone that I never know
acting like "miss-who-knows-all"
I keep myself being a childish
fooling around just to pamper my feeling
it's empty,
it's dark,
it's always been like that even
though I shone on the others' eyes.

I can see
but I'm blind inside
waiting for the false hope
like a dying corpse pretend could see the light
I hate making myself feel alone and lonely
but it keeps bugging me nights and days
should I just let it go
or continue to feel sorry for myself?

just this once,
I hope I get that chance,
the sweetness of a smile,
the brightness of a faith,
the happiness in me
shall bloom once again like the pink that I borrowed from the tree.

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